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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27096505">your wisdom is all that i need (don't you worry about me)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/comefeedtherainn/pseuds/comefeedtherainn'>comefeedtherainn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>IT (Movies - Muschietti)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Emetophobia, M/M, Nightmares, abuse mention, pddau</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 03:54:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,766</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27096505</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/comefeedtherainn/pseuds/comefeedtherainn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The first night Richie spends at Eddie's apartment is rough. </p><p>(tie-in fic for my twitter smau @pasdedeux_au)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eddie Kaspbrak/Richie Tozier</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>your wisdom is all that i need (don't you worry about me)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> The car is silent as Eddie drives, holding so tight to the steering wheel it creaks under his grip. He tries not to grind his teeth audibly, anger still hitting him in random bursts as he glances over at Richie, rigid from head to toe with his forehead pressed to the frigid window. He hasn't spoken a word since Eddie punched Connor - his knuckles still ache, throbbing a little from his death grip - and now seems to be intent on avoiding Eddie's eyes, as well. Beams of passing street lights wash over him like waves, casting his skin briefly in a pale orange before plunging him back into darkness.</p><p>"Um," Eddie says, clearing his throat awkwardly at how loud he sounds in the silence. "Are you sure you want to come to my place? I can ask Bev or something."</p><p>Richie shakes his head, humming quietly. He still doesn't look away from the window. "Mm."</p><p>"Okay."</p><p>Eddie parks on the street outside his apartment building, glancing at Richie when he doesn't move, forehead still pressed to the window. When Eddie reaches to touch his shoulder he sits up, a red mark left behind above his right brow.</p><p>"Rich," he says quietly. "Let's go inside."</p><p>Richie doesn't nod, but he does exit the car. He looks small, and Eddie realizes it's because he's curling in on himself, shoulders hunched and hands in his pockets, chin tipped toward his chest and eyes on the walkway as he follows Eddie to the door. They key is sticky in the lock, and Eddie struggles with it more than usual because he can't stop watching Richie, like he's going to crumble the second he's out of sight. He feels guilty for that, but something about Richie's energy is giving him the same hair-raising feeling one gets just before lightning strikes.</p><p>They make it two steps into Eddie's apartment before Richie's breathing starts to pick up, wheezing a bit in his chest and shuddering in his throat.</p><p>"Come on," Eddie says quietly, taking his hand and pulling him furhter inside. Turning on lights as he goes, he takes Richie to the kitchen, the fluorescent lights making him look gaunt and pale. Or maybe it's not the lights. Eddie's not entirely sure. He leaves him standing in the center of the room, a man so large his feet cause the linoleum tiles to groan in protest, but so small Eddie swears he could disappear if he turned inward any further. Eddiie looks away from him to search for a glass in a nearby cupboard, standing on his toes to reach the top shelf. Focusing on finishing a glass of water has helped him out of plenty of his own meltdowns in the past, so he figures it can't hurt to try. He has enough time to get hold of a glass before there is a horrible wretching sound, and he turns to find Richie throwing up in the sink.</p><p>"Shit," he whispers to himself, putting the glass aside and reaching to pull back the curls the frame Richie's face. "Sweetheart, it's okay," he murmurs, trying to soothe but not even sure if Richie hears him as he continues to cough and heave, shaking all over. "It's alright."</p><p>After a minute, Richie spits the last of it from his mouth, sobbing hoarsely.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I'm sorry."</p><p>"Richie, baby, no," Eddie says, pulling him gently to straighten up, taking his face into his hands. "Go sit down, I'll get you some water. It's okay. Don't be sorry."</p><p>Richie stumbles to sit at the table tucked beside the stove, still trembling and pressing shaky hands to his face. The curls on his hairline are damp with sweat, plastered to his skin. Eddie glances at him every few seconds as he rinses out the sink, not giving a second thought to the germs, and fills up the previously retrieved glass with cold water. He takes it to Richie, touching his forearm gently to get his attention before holding it out.</p><p>"Here," he says quietly. "Rinse out your mouth, then drink the rest."</p><p>Richie nods, avoiding his eyes as he gets up to do as he's told. He rinses out the sink a second time himself, his neck and cheeks turning bright red.</p><p>"You can take my bed," Eddie says, frowning when Richie shakes his head. "The couch isn't very big, Rich, I feel like you're gonna roll the fuck off of it in the night."</p><p>"No. S'fine." Richie still doesn't look at him, eyes on the wall above the sink.</p><p>Eddie sighs. "Okay. I'll go get you some blankets and pillows."</p><p>"Thank you."</p><p>Eddie leaves him to retrieve the spare blankets from the hall closet, as well as two of the many pillows from his own bed, and brings them all out to the living room. Richie is sitting on the couch, legs curled up into his chest and arms wrapped tight around them. He looks up at Eddie when he approaches, then quickly away again when they meet eyes. He takes the offered blanket, and props up the pillows against the arm of the couch.</p><p>"Thanks."</p><p>"Sure." Eddie hovers for a moment, torn between asking if he's alright and not wanting to smother. He takes a breath. "I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight."</p><p>"Night."</p><p>Eddie shuffles into his bedroom, closing the door behind him and immediately feeling bone tired. The throbbing in his knuckles becomes more noticeable and he winces, flexing the fist a few times in an attempt to alleviate the discomfort. He doesn't regret it, but he typically doesn't break people's noses. Not anymore, anyway. The pang of guilt at losing his cool, for the first time in years, in front of Richie hits him hard, makes his face burn. Fucking idiot. Defending the guy from violence with violence of his own. What kind of message did that send? Does Richie think he's just another guy who throws his weight around, now?</p><p>Still. The fucker deserved it.</p><p>He pulls his shirt over his head, only now realizing it's got some blood on it that is definitely not his, and tosses it over the chair in the corner so he'll remember to get the stains out. He wriggles out of his boots (he'd tracked dirt all over his place, Jesus, he is out of it) and kicks those aside, along with his jeans, before crawling into bed. He doesn't even get under the covers at first, his limbs feeling as if they weigh a thousand pounds and are being pulled down into the mattress. He closes his eyes, letting out a long breath through his nose. He might have passed out just like that, had his phone not buzzed.</p><p>
  
  
</p><p>Richie comes so quickly Eddie barely has time to sit up before he's practically falling into the bed. He crawls toward Eddie, wrapping his arms around his neck and tucking himself into his lap. Eddie holds him close to his chest, Richie's head under his chin, and rubs slow circles in his back.</p><p>"It's okay," he murmurs, holding tighter when Richie sniffles. "Richie, baby. It's okay."</p><p>"So fucking stupid," Richie croaks. "I'm so stupid."</p><p>"You're not."</p><p>"Let it go on for so long. Let him do so much fucked up shit."</p><p>"Sh."</p><p>Eddie presses a firm kiss to Richie's temple, then brushes his curls away from his forehead and kisses there, too.</p><p>"Let's go to sleep," he suggests. "You need some sleep."</p><p>Richie nods, sniffling and rubbing his eyes dry with the heels of both palms. "Yeah."</p><p>"C'mere."</p><p>Eddie shuffles onto his back, kicking the covers away so Richie can settle beside him before he pulls them back up. He rolls onto his side, reaching to brush Richie's hair out of his eyes again. It's pretty much a constant effort, he's realizing, but he doesn't mind. Richie's hair is soft.</p><p>"Better?" he asks, smiling a bit when Richie nods. "Good. Try to sleep."</p><p>Richie hums, closing his eyes but not settling down. Eddie reaches, rubbing his thumb over the worry lines crinkling Richie's brow. Blue eyes flutter open again, watching him from underneath dark lashes as he smoothes the lines away.</p><p>"Tense," Eddie murmurs, feeling nervous and comfortable all at once with the proximity. It would only be a matter of a few inches to lean in and....do something stupid. He doesn't.</p><p>"Mm," Richie hums, a low rumble in his chest that makes goosebumps rise on Eddie's arms. "Usually am at night. Can't sleep for shit."</p><p>"Told you to see a doctor," Eddie scolds softly, running his fingers through Richie's flopping bangs without really thinking. He's about to stop, but Richie's eyelids flutter, so he figures it's okay, moving to scratching his nails gently along his scalp. "You'll get sick. Dementia."</p><p>Richie smiles, eyes still closed gently. "Mm. Too hot to get dementia."</p><p>"That's literally not how that works."</p><p>Richie laughs quietly, and it's such a nice sound, such a relief, that Eddie smiles, too.</p><p>"Go to sleep, jackass."</p><p>"Keep petting my hair and I fucking will."</p><p>"Okay."</p><hr/><p>Eddie's body is awake before his brain, realizing belatedly that Richie is shouting and tossing his head in his sleep. He rolls over, resisting the urge to shake him and instead petting his hair again, as well as he can with Richie writhing around.</p><p>"Easy, easy," he murmurs, quiet enough not to wake him too suddenly. "You're okay. It's okay."</p><p>Richie gasps, sitting bolt upright and narrowly missing cracking Eddie in the face on his way up.</p><p>"It's okay," Eddie says again holding tightly to his forearms. "You're with me. It's okay."</p><p>Richie pants heavily, eyes swiveling toward him. Eddie squeezes his arm three times, and Richie relaxes.</p><p>"Fuck," he croaks, wiping sweat away from his forehead. "Fuck, I'm sorry."</p><p>"Dont' be sorry," Eddie says. "Just a nightmare."</p><p>"Yeah." Richie swallows, grimacing, and accepts the bottle of water Eddie offers from his nightstand. "Thanks. Sorry, I'll go sleep in the living room. You don't have to deal with this."</p><p>Eddie's not sure what possesses him, but in the next moment he has his chest pressed to Richie's back, skin to skin, and his arms and legs wrapped around him like a cocoon. He presses his palm to Richie's heart, and he swears he can feel it gradually slowing. He hopes he isn't imagining it.</p><p>"Don't go," he says, pressing his mouth to Richie's shoulder. It's warm, a little tacky from sweat. "Stay with me."</p><p>Richie is silent for a moment, then holds onto Eddie's arms where they cross over his chest, big hands curling over thin wrists.</p><p>"Okay."</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I can be found @comefeedthrainn on twitter, and the smau this fic is for (a reddie-centric ballet au) is @pasdedeux_au!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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